This is a change

So, as many of you know- I just started college. My goodness, how much I love it here. I am so content, more content than I ever could have imagined. Normally, I am a homebody and love hanging out at home- easily getting homesick when I leave. However, that has not been the case here. My biggest struggle has actually been just changes within myself. It has only been a week, and I just feel...different. Never before have I struggled with body image- well not a lot- but here, it is a hard thing. These people haven't known me forever...they just know who they see. I watch guys and girls pair off like it is the freakin' ark and well, I'm like that one unicorn that didn't have a mate so I got left off the boat!(kidding!). I just never expected to struggle with not feeling pretty or feeling like there are hundreds of better girl choices other than me. I mean, this campus is nuts! I feel guilty in a way, because I feel like my heart should be yearning for God...but instead I am wanting a guy. Guys are undependable anyway! Sometimes I just hate being a teenage girl.
My heart is feeling kind of...mystified. I came to school knowing exactly what I wanted to do with my life, and now, I am questioning it. My heart has been set on the Ministry for a long time. I know it is what I am called to do, but I just feel like the breaks came on all of a sudden or something. I feel like in time, everything will calm down and I will find my feet again. I just wish I knew what to do. My goal is to set my heart on God and if I find a guy, great. If not...oh well? All I know is, if I trust my heart to God- he won't hurt it. I guess that is something to remember.

Thanks for reading my whiny post, I hope your day is great!!!