"Why are you looking for love? Why are you still searching, as if I'm not enough?"
Yes, this is part of the lyrics to a Tenth Avenue North song, but this line never leaves my mind. One thing I say about Anderson to people is, it suffers from what I like to call "Noah's Ark Syndrome", and if you haven't heard of this horrible disease, RUN! Its like everyone is pairing off into twos because apparently God is opening the flood gates tomorrow and you NEED a mate like you NEED oxygen. I love guys and everything, but dear goodness, do you people really need to run so quickly? And on that note, do you need to spread it to me?!
I guess the point of this Blog is to talk about things that have been on my mind and heart lately, and this is one of them.
God created us to love and be loved, so we not only desire his love- but earthly love as well. But the issue in being human is that I find myself desiring earthly love-or even like, more than I desire God's. Within myself, I have a real issue. I'm a complete hypocrite! I tell myself that God has my heart, why should I want a fella? I've gone 19 years without one, what will change? I know I don't need one to survive.
But then I think "Man, it would sure be nice to have one."
Sometimes, I wish I could listen to my own advice. But I'll admit, it is easier said than done.
I find myself often treating God like Santa Claus- "Dear Lord, I'd like him!" Or "Dear Lord, can I have a guy? One that is funny and fun to be around? One that loves you? You know, if you send me a Christian guy, our relationship will bring us closer to you..." I call myself out on the complete CRAP in my prayers. This relationship, is between me and God so I better wait it out. What I really need to do is focus on loving God, and I know that the exact moment I least expect it, I will have someone. Too bad I'm so impatient. I feel like this is something God and I constantly work on; patience and understanding. Sometimes I go nuts because I have no idea of what God is doing and then BAM I was wrong. Obviously.
What I constantly lose sight of, is that in the end, the only relationship that will ever matter- is my relationship with God. (Not that I think my relationships are pointless- because they aren't- I just hope that you get what I am saying.) I say all of this to say, sometimes- we need to stop looking for earthly love, and let God love on us. If we let God love on us, we will never be disappointed- and in the end, we will come out with something better than expected. So, I will end this with one of my favorite lines from a This Beautiful Republic EP- you know, because that's how I roll.
God, " You can take your time- you've got my heart in mind"
-jennie
"You can take Your time, you've got my heart in mind"
